Which Way from Here?

Remember Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, when Alice came upon the Cheshire Cat sitting in the crook of a tree?

“Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to go from here?”

“That depends a good deal on where you want to get to,” said the cat.

“I don’t much care where—” said Alice.

“Then it doesn’t matter which way you go,” said the cat.

“—so long as I get somewhere,” Alice added as an explanation.

“Oh, you’re sure to do that,” said the cat, “if you only walk long enough.”

Wise cat.

Often we feel like Alice, standing at a fork in the road, looking in both directions, not knowing which way to go. The Cheshire Cat’s response offers us a profound and troubling truth: If you don’t know where you’re going, any road will do. And if you keep on, in no particular direction, you’re sure to get somewhere-but don’t be surprised if it’s not the place you hoped for.

What’s your goal for your family? You may be thinking, That’s simple-survival. Each night my head touches the pillow, I’m just thankful I made it through another day.

Sometimes survival seems like the best we can do. But it is, at best, a short-term goal. Let’s think a little farther down the road. If your passion is your family, what’s your purpose as a parent? Your answer will determine whether your family experiences frustration or fulfillment.

If your passion is your family, what’s your purpose as a parent?

Look around at the families in your neighborhood. Contrary to popular opinion, the success of a family is not measured by the speed you travel or how many different directions you go. Frantic and frenzied schedules seldom add character or depth to a family.

It reminds me of the old joke about two friends heading off on a road trip to California. As they’re speeding along the highway, the passenger asks the driver, “How are we doing?” And his buddy replies, “I have no idea where we are, but we’re making great time!”

That’s the heart of the problem for many families: lack of direction. Like Alice, they’re not sure which way to go, but from the looks of all the activity around them, they need to be going somewhere—and fast.